Wednesday, September 30, 2009

Four years?

A lot has happened since she left us. We miss having her for those special moments...or even just the everyday moments...
but life just keeps moving on. We've had babies...
Pippi's surpassed her in age. She's lost a mouthful of teeth.
She's started school.
Our family has returned to Disneyland.
We let an animal move in with us.We've driven across the country several times. The Warlock still is hiking in Southern Utah, watching football in the Fall, and doing the Daddy cooking show. He's even picked up running. Pippi can turn a room into disarray in 5 seconds flat in a fever of wild imagination. Grandma and Grandpa B still sail in the ocean. Grandma and Grandpa P are hiking, biking, fishing, building, and camping up a storm. We still can feel joy. We still feel pain. We're LIVING.

The Warlock said tonight as I wallowed in my inadequacy: "Sometimes we can concentrate so hard on being better people that we forget to just enjoy the journey."

15 comments:

The Warlock said...

Interesting that you should post this today. I spent a lot of time thinking about Stacy today, sad that she has gone, happy and enriched that we had her for as long as we did. But more than anything, longing to hold her again and just have her be here.

Sheralie said...

I always love hearing about Stacy. It seems the little moments we miss the most. I think of all the people I know, you are a specialist in enjoying the moment . . . I miss those walks and talks home with you.

eryka said...

I was thinking of Stacy the other day while I made 7 layer dip for the BYU game. She was so sweet. I remember how she loved to tell me everything that was going on in her life. She loved to talk. I remembered her wanting to be Isaac's little Mom too. She was so good with him. I miss your family. We love you.

citymama1 said...

What a special post and what a great quote from The Warlock. I am trying to be better at being present in the moment.

Jess said...

I woke up thinking about Stacy this morning, then I looked at the calendar and remembered why. I now have a sweet blond girl of my own, but Stacy was the original. We love her, and we love all of you too!

Prudence said...

I thought about Stacy all week. I can never read about her in your blog without crying! We miss her so much! Love you guys.

Jaime said...

I was thinking about Stacy today as well. I can still see her crystal blue eyes looking at me over the pew at church just watch and smiling. I can't believe 4 years have passed since she was here.

Christine said...

Four years. That seems like such a very, very long time. Last night I read something by Robert Frost, "In three words I can sum up everything I've learned about life: it goes on." You are an inspiration to me as I watch you move forward with faith and courage. You are right, many special moments and everyday moments have passed, but surely Stacy has been with you even though you cannot see her. I'm praying that you have felt comfort and peace as you reflect and think back to four years ago.

Lisa said...

Stacy is such a Joy! I think of her as talking to my new babies before they come to earth. I imagine her saying, "she's my aunt and she is going to be a great mom to you!" Don't you think she would tell them how much fun she had with all of us?

Jecca Lee Ivie Johnson said...

Like Prudence, I can rarely get through the blogs about Stacy with dry eyes. Such a special, sweet girl. I keep a constant prayer in my heart for your little family and I just feel so grateful for the gospel and the gift of knowledge that we have. Stacy's around, I have no doubts.

Natalie said...

I love Stacy! Sometimes I see some of her personality traits in Madeline and it makes me happy. She had such an excitement for life and you were such a good mom for her because you let her explore using all of her senses. I have a memory of making cookies with you and Stacy and she mixed the dough with her hands. They were covered! Then, she licked each of her dough-covered fingers clean. That's the way to live! Fully enjoying the moment. I agree with Sheralie, you do a wonderful job of enjoying the moment. I love Stacy!

Witty said...

I treasure all of those special memories we had together with you and Nick and Stacy and Pippi while we were at BYU together. Whenever I think of my family, I never forget to think of her.

Prairie Smoke said...

I have a flower bed that I plant with pink flowers each year in memory of Stacy. This year the dog dug it up worse than usual. I really wanted to smack him! I never did because I thought Stacy wouldn't want me to. She would probably think the bones he has buried there were interesting. I am so grateful to know that I will see Stacy again.

Deon said...

I love you guys! I was thinking about her last week. Like others, I can't read about her on your blog without crying. We will all miss her and be better for knowing her, even if just a little.

Melissa said...

One of my favorite paintings always reminds me of your two oldest girls - even though I never actually met Stacy. I always think of the two little girls in "Carnation, Lily, Lily, Rose" by John Singer Sargent, as being your girls.