I spent Mother's Day this year just trying to figure out how I felt about Mother's Day.
The Saturday before, I waited in the car with Bardo (he was sleeping) and Pippi (she wanted to stay in the car) while the Warlock went to a sports store to get a tennis racket for my gift, as I requested. It all seemed so shallow and pointless...
I remembered Mother's Day as a child. Sometimes it was fun. Dad would get special foods so we could make Mom a special breakfast. I also remembered my Mom and Dad playing hookie from church to go to Fairmont Hot Springs (we still went to church). And I remembered a tragic Mother's Day when the holiday went completely unacknowledged.
I also keep thinking about how the world seems to have such high expectations of women, or perhaps women have high expectations of themselves. No one seems to be able to fill the whole mold: career, family, service, glowing personality, sexy body. People who stay home with their kids say they don't feel fulfilled being "just" a mom.
But I can't feel so heavy. I love my job. I am just a Mom, and it's enough. And I decided that I will not spend Mother's Day dwelling on my inadequacies as a human being, in fact, I decided that I need not dwell on myself at all. I will not expect gifts or acknowledgment for bearing and raising Bardo and Pippi, and I will focus on the great mothers in my life. There are many. So to all you mothers out there: Happy Mother's Day!