Lately, I've been troubled. This world of ours... Is it really so much worse than it used to be? Is it really any more dangerous for Pippi to be riding through the neighborhood at age 6 than it was for me to be riding through the neighborhood at age 6? I seem to remember wandering the neighborhood on my bike, with training wheels. Are we just more aware? How is this Silly Witch, supposed to protect Pippi and give Pippi enough freedom to be her creative and social self?
I think I'm probably looked upon as a permissive parent.
I allow my kids (yes, Bardo, too) to run through the woods along the trails in our neighborhood. Pippi has a tree. She says it's hers. She calls it Rose. Rose likes to be climbed, by Pippi. Bardo likes to sit on this tree. Occasionally we'll see small bugs climbing over the tree. We don't care. They are Rose's friends.
Saturday we went to the playground. A very large tree was knocked down in the "woods" nearby. Pippi overlooked the playground equipment and went to test her balance by walking along this tall tree. She balanced across from top to bottom. As she was playing on the tree, a father came to me, "You know, kids need to be careful in the woods this time of year. There are copperheads everywhere." "Yes, I guess my daughter will have to pay attention." He then told his daughter, a girl of 10, I'd guess, that this was her chance to climb a tree. She wouldn't budge. As Pippi reached the top of the tree again, she tripped a little. A little trip on a narrow tree trunk, on the part elevated the most off the ground equals a scary fall. Her back was scraped on one of the protruding branches, and it hurt. It was ugly. She couldn't see her injury, so she didn't cry for long. The father looked at Pippi and said, "Ooooo, I bet you won't climb trees again. You've learned a lesson." On the way home, I asked Pippi if she would climb trees again. She replied, "Yes. I'll just be more careful." And I felt relieved, not just because she'd be more careful, but because she was going to still do something that she loved. I wouldn't want Rose to get lonely.
When I'm doing dishes or working in the kitchen during the day, Bardo lets himself outside. The dog will snatch his snack out of his hands. Bardo will cry for a moment then come to the window and tell on the dog, "Waaaaa, Puuuuuppy. Take." I'll give him a hug and after a second in my embrace he'll squirm to be out the door again. If the "turtle pool" is full of water he'll go wading. Eventually he'll fall and get wet. He'll want his wet clothes off, so I let him run around in a diaper until it's time to come inside.
Sometimes Pippi rides far ahead of me on her bike. So far ahead of me that the dog stops and waits for me, and I can only see the dog, and not Pippi. He's not comfortable being that far away from me. Pippi is. Eventually she stops and waits for me. As I catch up with her I'll find her collecting flowers, leaves, rocks, or grass by herself, having a great time, alone. I had that as a child, time, alone, outside.
So I've been thinking: How can I give these children the freedom, the stillness, the independence, that they will need by the time they're ten, (I'm guessing here. Pippi's bursting at the seams with energy right now.) and still keep her safe from sexual predators, bullies, copperheads, alligators, spiders, etc.?
No matter what, before I set her free, she's gonna have to take a cell phone. Also, I need to figure out a way to train Hunter to take care of her. Maybe I can send him to Search and Rescue school or something. First, I'll probably have to teach him how to happily be tied to a tree. Most of all, I'll have to train Pippi. I need to raise a child that I can trust. She needs to know her limitations. She needs to be able to ask for help. She needs to be able to read people, to keep herself safe, and to know when she's driving her friends' parents crazy. She needs to be obedient, or she's not going anywhere.
So I don't feel like a permissive parent. I feel like a control freak. And I don't like it.
Tuesday, April 29, 2008
Monday, April 28, 2008
Saturday, April 26, 2008
Why a Warlock is a Perfect Match for a Silly Witch
Last night The Warlock and I celebrated our ninth anniversary. The Warlock, to make up for all the eating out that he does without me (for work), made a reservation at Brennans, a very nice restaurant in downtown Houston. I haven't enjoyed eating out in a very long time, but last night, I loved it. The food was great, the company was great, the atmosphere was great, and our waiter said thank you (2 of my most favorite words) several times. Governor Pataki (of New York) even made an appearance.
Anyway, onto my list:
1- The Warlock is a talker. I am a listener. This works out perfectly, and really I can listen to him for hours. He's a brilliant thinker with a mind that processes about twice as fast as mine, and I always learn interesting things when we converse.
2- He has quite strong opinions. And his opinions make sense. But I can change them (sometimes).
3- The Warlock loves music and he knows about it. His tastes differ quite a bit from mine, so I'm grateful to him for introducing me to the world of Classic Rock. He also has a good sense about which songs I can tolerate out of his Rock Band and Guitar Hero video games. The Warlock has a great voice, and it's a pleasure to sing hymns next to him in church.
4- The Warlock has a good heart. He always wants to do things for people. He loves giving money to people and charities.
5- The Warlock really respects our kids. He's a natural teacher and is not afraid of explaining difficult concepts to Pippi. Her soccer games (and other activities) are very important to him, and he dreams of the day when he will be able to coach.
6- The Warlock loves the out-outdoors. He likes the backcountry best, where there are few people. He's a backpacking equipment junkie (Pippi even has a pack), I think to help him dream of the isolation that he gets when backpacking in the desert.
7- The Warlock says he doesn't like other people's kids, but this is not true. He loves ALL kids. He just doesn't like babysitting. He really likes teenagers, which don't require babysitting.
8- The Warlock loves to read. His profession requires a lot of (boring, to me) reading, but still, the Warlock goes to bed with a book, usually the Lord of the Rings. He enjoys fine literature, but NOT Jane Austen.
9- The Warlock likes to shop. He likes to buy things for me. What woman wouldn't love this? He finds it hard to deny me anything. Luckily, I have the sense to not make demands that would push him (or our finances) over the edge.
10-I adore this man. He holds me when I cry. He laughs at me when I take myself too seriously. He teaches me when I need to know. He loves me, and I am SO lucky.
Anyway, onto my list:
1- The Warlock is a talker. I am a listener. This works out perfectly, and really I can listen to him for hours. He's a brilliant thinker with a mind that processes about twice as fast as mine, and I always learn interesting things when we converse.
2- He has quite strong opinions. And his opinions make sense. But I can change them (sometimes).
3- The Warlock loves music and he knows about it. His tastes differ quite a bit from mine, so I'm grateful to him for introducing me to the world of Classic Rock. He also has a good sense about which songs I can tolerate out of his Rock Band and Guitar Hero video games. The Warlock has a great voice, and it's a pleasure to sing hymns next to him in church.
4- The Warlock has a good heart. He always wants to do things for people. He loves giving money to people and charities.
5- The Warlock really respects our kids. He's a natural teacher and is not afraid of explaining difficult concepts to Pippi. Her soccer games (and other activities) are very important to him, and he dreams of the day when he will be able to coach.
6- The Warlock loves the out-outdoors. He likes the backcountry best, where there are few people. He's a backpacking equipment junkie (Pippi even has a pack), I think to help him dream of the isolation that he gets when backpacking in the desert.
7- The Warlock says he doesn't like other people's kids, but this is not true. He loves ALL kids. He just doesn't like babysitting. He really likes teenagers, which don't require babysitting.
8- The Warlock loves to read. His profession requires a lot of (boring, to me) reading, but still, the Warlock goes to bed with a book, usually the Lord of the Rings. He enjoys fine literature, but NOT Jane Austen.
9- The Warlock likes to shop. He likes to buy things for me. What woman wouldn't love this? He finds it hard to deny me anything. Luckily, I have the sense to not make demands that would push him (or our finances) over the edge.
10-I adore this man. He holds me when I cry. He laughs at me when I take myself too seriously. He teaches me when I need to know. He loves me, and I am SO lucky.
Friday, April 25, 2008
Independence
We just caught Bardo with a mouthful of dog food. I told him it was "yucky," so he spit it into a chewed up heap on the floor. "Do you want a drink of water?" "Watta," he replies and grabs the spray bottle off the table and sprays it into his mouth.
Tuesday, April 22, 2008
Quotes from the weekend
See if you can figure out which family member said each quote.
1. "Don't put your marshmallow under mine. There is marshmallow roasting etiquette."
2. "If you roll the cookie into a perfectly round ball, the cookie will look much prettier."
3. "Check it out. Hunter likes to play soccer, too."
4. "We will we will wock you."
1. "Don't put your marshmallow under mine. There is marshmallow roasting etiquette."
2. "If you roll the cookie into a perfectly round ball, the cookie will look much prettier."
3. "Check it out. Hunter likes to play soccer, too."
4. "We will we will wock you."
Tuesday, April 15, 2008
"Arm. Hurts."
Bardo toppled a chair over at a restaurant this weekend. He came up with his arm looking slightly bent. The Warlock was sure he was fine, and told me that it was normal for arms to look different from one another. The on-call pediatrician assured me (0ver the phone) that the injury was not serious and could wait until Monday after asking me a variety of questions. "Are all of his fingernails nice and pink?" "Is he using the arm?""Is he crying more than usual?""Does it hurt when you put pressure on it?" At the Ward Chili cook-off, an orthopedic PA friends declared Bardo free of acute injury after gently squeezing and moving his arm around.
I was still concerned Monday because Bardo, would cry when his arm was moved in certain ways. He also looked me in the eye and said, "Arm. Hurts." So I took him to the pediatrician who sent me to the hospital. I then waited at home for the doctor's phone call to tell me it was a buckle fracture. The pediatrician than sent me to the orthopedist the next morning. He decided to put a "precautionary" cast on Bardo's arm.
Anyway, the cast is "precautionary" because the bone would have healed fine without it. The cast is placed on him to protect the bone during the healing time so that the bone doesn't break all the way through if Bardo were to fall and catch himself. And if you're worried about the dark marks on his face and hands, just keep in mind that he's pressed against the kitchen door. Note the puppy nose prints on the door.
Anyway with all the running around I've done and will do with this arm thing, I wonder if just taking him to the ER on Friday or Saturday might have been easier.
Bardo has been more than cooperative through the whole ordeal. When they put the cast on him this morning, he sat on the table, watching the nurse's every turn with the tape. I didn't even have to hold him. And when she finished, he held up his other arm to get a cast on it, too.
I was still concerned Monday because Bardo, would cry when his arm was moved in certain ways. He also looked me in the eye and said, "Arm. Hurts." So I took him to the pediatrician who sent me to the hospital. I then waited at home for the doctor's phone call to tell me it was a buckle fracture. The pediatrician than sent me to the orthopedist the next morning. He decided to put a "precautionary" cast on Bardo's arm.
Anyway, the cast is "precautionary" because the bone would have healed fine without it. The cast is placed on him to protect the bone during the healing time so that the bone doesn't break all the way through if Bardo were to fall and catch himself. And if you're worried about the dark marks on his face and hands, just keep in mind that he's pressed against the kitchen door. Note the puppy nose prints on the door.
Anyway with all the running around I've done and will do with this arm thing, I wonder if just taking him to the ER on Friday or Saturday might have been easier.
Bardo has been more than cooperative through the whole ordeal. When they put the cast on him this morning, he sat on the table, watching the nurse's every turn with the tape. I didn't even have to hold him. And when she finished, he held up his other arm to get a cast on it, too.
Sunday, April 13, 2008
Tagged--The Box
How This Game Of Tag Works:
~Link to your tagger and post these rules on your blog.
~Share seven facts about yourself on your blog, some random, some weird, whatever you are brave enough to share.
~Tag seven people at the end of your post by leaving their names as well as links to their blogs.
~Let them know they are tagged by leaving a comment on their blog.
Thank you Sheralie for the opportunity to shamelessly talk about myself.
A little while my mom sent be a box full of things from my high school years. Lately I've been regretting what a total twit I was back then, and wondering how anyone could have liked me. I felt like I lacked character back then and that I didn't have a charitable heart. Most of all I felt sorry. But, "the box" showed me that I wasn't all bad in those difficult teenage years, and so now, I will share with you some thoughts about the younger Silly Witch.
1. I was obsessed with sports. My self worth was partially dependent on how well I was doing in sports. I played basketball, volleyball, and ran track. In Junior High I slept with a basketball. I would lay on my bed practicing my shooting form. I put sports above everything, accept school. I missed church activities, I ditched a piano festival (my teacher was NOT happy about this), I had zero social life--all to participate in sports or watch sports.
2. My freshman year, I ran myself ragged and caught mono. I had to relax. I had to quit track. I quit piano lessons. And I took a break from seminary. I would come home from school and just sleep. All I did was sleep. And it still seemed to take forever to recover.
3. Even though I was not devoted to Mutual, my YW leaders loved me and always made me feel special. I'm sure they were disappointed in my lack of interest in the Young Women awards, but they often wrote me very nice notes telling me about the qualities I possessed. "The box" contained a few of these notes.
4. One leader told me she admired my no frills personality. I have to laugh at that--because it's true, completely true, even still.
5. I was a very cranky teenager. I wasn't nice to my Mom, and for that I'm very very sorry. Now, I LOVE my Mom. She's one of my best friends.
6. In general, I didn't get along with other teenagers very well. I didn't have the desire or maturity to date seriously, I didn't understand why anyone would want to party, drink, do drugs or even just "hang out." I liked spending time with my family. I think this was one result of my "no frills" personality.
7. The box showed me that I was a good kid, not exceptional, but good. The teenage years can be fun, but really, they were hard for me, so, I'm happy I survived a time where stupid decisions can ruin your whole life without making any really bad choices.
I'm tagging: Julianne, Jessica, Jaime, Amberly, Erin, Kim, and Soccermom Stephanie.
~Link to your tagger and post these rules on your blog.
~Share seven facts about yourself on your blog, some random, some weird, whatever you are brave enough to share.
~Tag seven people at the end of your post by leaving their names as well as links to their blogs.
~Let them know they are tagged by leaving a comment on their blog.
Thank you Sheralie for the opportunity to shamelessly talk about myself.
A little while my mom sent be a box full of things from my high school years. Lately I've been regretting what a total twit I was back then, and wondering how anyone could have liked me. I felt like I lacked character back then and that I didn't have a charitable heart. Most of all I felt sorry. But, "the box" showed me that I wasn't all bad in those difficult teenage years, and so now, I will share with you some thoughts about the younger Silly Witch.
1. I was obsessed with sports. My self worth was partially dependent on how well I was doing in sports. I played basketball, volleyball, and ran track. In Junior High I slept with a basketball. I would lay on my bed practicing my shooting form. I put sports above everything, accept school. I missed church activities, I ditched a piano festival (my teacher was NOT happy about this), I had zero social life--all to participate in sports or watch sports.
2. My freshman year, I ran myself ragged and caught mono. I had to relax. I had to quit track. I quit piano lessons. And I took a break from seminary. I would come home from school and just sleep. All I did was sleep. And it still seemed to take forever to recover.
3. Even though I was not devoted to Mutual, my YW leaders loved me and always made me feel special. I'm sure they were disappointed in my lack of interest in the Young Women awards, but they often wrote me very nice notes telling me about the qualities I possessed. "The box" contained a few of these notes.
4. One leader told me she admired my no frills personality. I have to laugh at that--because it's true, completely true, even still.
5. I was a very cranky teenager. I wasn't nice to my Mom, and for that I'm very very sorry. Now, I LOVE my Mom. She's one of my best friends.
6. In general, I didn't get along with other teenagers very well. I didn't have the desire or maturity to date seriously, I didn't understand why anyone would want to party, drink, do drugs or even just "hang out." I liked spending time with my family. I think this was one result of my "no frills" personality.
7. The box showed me that I was a good kid, not exceptional, but good. The teenage years can be fun, but really, they were hard for me, so, I'm happy I survived a time where stupid decisions can ruin your whole life without making any really bad choices.
I'm tagging: Julianne, Jessica, Jaime, Amberly, Erin, Kim, and Soccermom Stephanie.
Monday, April 07, 2008
Sunday Walk
Once upon a time 2 children, a dog, and a Silly Witch went for a walk. The dog and the girl ran around wildly and excitedly, the girl chanting, "We're ooooofffffff leeeeeeeaaaaash."
The toddler in the backpack called "Yay!"
This is what they saw:
A bird
Wildflowers
Wildflowers:
And more wildflowers:
The toddler needed to touch them. They were so beautiful!
Pippi needed to get a picture with the flowers.
A few minutes later the Silly Witch looked down, and this had magically appeared in her pocket.
Then the dog fell in the water and couldn't get out, Bardo stepped in an ant pile, and Pippi said she saw an alligator and a shark fin.
The toddler in the backpack called "Yay!"
This is what they saw:
A bird
Wildflowers
Wildflowers:
And more wildflowers:
The toddler needed to touch them. They were so beautiful!
Pippi needed to get a picture with the flowers.
A few minutes later the Silly Witch looked down, and this had magically appeared in her pocket.
Then the dog fell in the water and couldn't get out, Bardo stepped in an ant pile, and Pippi said she saw an alligator and a shark fin.
Astros Game
Thanks to "Uncle Skadden," we had the opportunity to attend the Astro's game a week ago. We had a great time pretending to be outside on a hot day. Houston's hot weather along with the beautiful Minute Maid Stadium may make a baseball fan out of me.
Bardo enjoyed his first game. He seems to like anything with a field and a ball.
And, check out what Pippi got:
She didn't catch it herself. This guy caught it from a broadcasting box. It was a great catch, and it was nice of him to part with it.
Bardo enjoyed his first game. He seems to like anything with a field and a ball.
And, check out what Pippi got:
She didn't catch it herself. This guy caught it from a broadcasting box. It was a great catch, and it was nice of him to part with it.
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